As many of you have figured out within the last few weeks, I cut my hair. Chopped, gone, and perhaps now in some garbage incinerator floating up to the sky. I have cut my hair before, around my 18th birthday (that’s about two years ago, yes I am young!), I told my hairdresser that I was tired of my shoulder brushing mane and to cut me the edgyist style she could think of. And I rocked it, HARD, in fact the majority of my friends in New York remembered me with my short hair cut, so when I came back to New York this summer after a year of being abroad with my hair back to my shoulders, a lot of my friends were like “huh? Arielle?”
(left: spring 2008 before I left NYU, right: summer 2009 when I returned to NYC)
There was only one difference though between my previous cut and my current one, the sodium hydroxide also known as a relaxer that kept my hair pin straight (until that new growth kicked in!). After cutting your hair once, the idea of not having hair is not scary. So when I started toying with the idea of cutting my hair again and going natural, being considered “bald-headed” was not a concern. I was scared of the idea that for 11 years, I had not felt the real texture of my hair and I literally had no idea what it would look like. For months, I would allow my hair to grow out (I think I made it to 5 months without a relaxer once!), and pull my mixed relaxed hair and natural hair back into a ponytail and stare in the mirror trying to figure out how it would look if my new growth was all that was there.
And then came the question of my profession, in truth, I’m going to be a writer and now I’m dabbling in film, so having natural hair in the arts shouldn’t cause a huge issue, but what if I changed my mind and wanted to go back to the office setting? As free-thinking as I try to be, the world as it is and as it should be are two different things, simply black women with natural hair or afros are looked at as being either radical, unkept, or both by the majority of America. I went to see Good Hair and Chris Rock did a fabulous job on illustrating the relationships that black women have with their hair. I was so proud to have cut my hair and taken the natural step weeks before and let this be a written testimony that I will never put another relaxer in my hair.
I feel healthier body and spirit wise because I believe my hair was carrying some serious negative energy and pieces of me that I had outgrown long ago. Shout out to Chrissi J. from Pikanini’s Natural Hair Spa in Brooklyn, NY on Franklin and Fulton St for making my “go-natural” experience beautiful and memorable.
My next steps are to graduate, continue writing, and produce my documentary (more details to come). But “in the mean time,” as a new member of the indie film community, I would like to share something very special with y’all and hope you’ll show some love in return.
Shout out to the writer and director of Underbelly, Donald A.C. Conley. You can purchase the full film at http://indieflix.com
For everyone who knows me, the NAACP was basically the launching pad of my activism. Our centennial convention was definitely a fabulous one, despite all the drama and the fact that I had to work during the majority of it. However, I did get the opportunity to sit in on an awesome panel discussion with Jeff Johnson and meet/introduce the GREAT Dr. Cornel West.
I’m not going to write for too long, but I will drop some quotes from Dr. West’s speech. Thank you for reinspiring me and my activism to new heights.
“Too many folks strutting around like peacocks, OH LOOK AT ME, but peacocks only strut because they can’t fly”
“Straighen your back up because how can some one ride it if it’s not there”
“It’s a wonder that there is no Black Al-Queida, the world has something to learn from black folks”
“I love Lil Wayne, I love that little negro, I sure do” LOL
So much more said, but in the words of Dr. West, the NAACP was America’s first ANTI-TERROISM organization, American Terrorism that was lynching and killing black folks all over the country.
Happy Birthday NAACP and thanks for all you’ve shown and done for me.
So it’s been about a month since I’ve been back in New York or I should say since God brought me back to New York. All is well on the job, I still love my agency and we’ve managed not to kill each other in 30 days, so something must be going right! Nevertheless, everything else you could possibly think of basically has been repeatedly throwing me off the roof.
For one, I still haven’t found an apartment. UGGGHHHH Between crazy realtors, scamming fake landlords, 3 hour day commutes back and forth from Jersey/sharing a twin bed with my home girl just to avoid too many commuting costs, I began to go down the slide without asking anyone to push me.
As I slipped down the metal sheet, nails scrapping the material, trying to go back up to the peace of mind I had when I was in Spain, someone decided to step on my fingers or rather smash them so I couldn’t climb back up. Three bad customer service experiences in two hours thanks to Steve Madden and Aldo’s faulty sales associates on 34th Street, TastiDLite servers forgetting orders, and the bird that literally fell off the roof and died right in front of me, I finally said you know what…something is coming. If that wasn’t worse enough, my prescription written by my doctor in Spain was rejected because it’s not from the U.S. and NYU’s Health Center refused to reissue it since I attended a university in Spain last semester and not their programs. Direct quote from the Health Center manager “I’m sorry, I’m really not trying to be difficult, but I can’t see you until 2 weeks before school starts, that’s when you are considered a student here again.” Could you imagine if I actually needed that prescription to live!
Then, once I hit the bottom of the slide and thought I was just sitting on the ground, one of my bestfriends drop kicked the shit out of me (and I’m sorry for the language but that’s the nicest way I can describe it). I won’t go into details for the sake of his privacy, but to sum it all up, lack of honesty and hidden pieces of his soul caused me to jump and fall on my ass. And all my realest friends laughed and said “Arielle get up, you will be OKAY” and showed no pity lol. I might have gotten a little soft in Europe, but New York has truly put me in its mouth, chewed me up, and spit me back out in a matter of weeks.
Now, I’m just floating in the air, taking in the view of the skyline, and remembering the city that made me a stronger person. The weak never survive in this city, it’s strength that rebuilds a broken life.
Coming home last Thursday (June 11) literally put me in a depression mode. I was broke, snatched from Europe due to faulty internship planning, no job, and in the middle of the suburbs in Jersey. However, my awesome boss from last summer, Yianni Garcia, had sent me a facebook message the same day I decided to head home to the states informing me that one of his friends was looking for an assistant for a new york modeling agency. Honestly, I was a tad hesitant because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to enter back into the fashion industry. Being in Spain allowed me to focus heavily on my community work in addition to providing a great atmosphere for me to write. Well needless to say, I went on the interview with Code Model Management and got hired on the spot. They were impressed, I was impressed, and everything just fell into place. This position is literally the best thing that has probably happened to me. My co-workers/supervisors are amazing and there is so much room for growth in the company and my career. Between scouting for new models, booking test shoots, putting together portfolio books, and a ton more, I almost run to the office every morning (and you all know I am NOT a morning person). I am just pure excited about this new job. Now I just have to focus on simultaneously building my writing portfolio; however, I doubt that I will be leaving Code anytime soon. Feeling pure bliss!~
I’ll keep you guys posted!
Ari
It has been an interesting semester, hasn’t it? I began January by flying to Madrid to be in NYU in Madrid’s program, living in Spain’s capitol, and feeling for the second time what it’s like to be a study abroad American student in Europe. And then I returned and I saw my country swear in the first African-American president in our history and stood on the front lawn of the capital experiencing something that I hope to tell not just my children, or my grandchildren, but my great-grandchildren and I hope the stories continue to go on generation by generation. It was that amazing tone that seemed to set my semester to something incredible, to a level that I couldn’t even imagine at the time. And then my father was sworn in to be a superior court judge that same week, something he has worked for endlessly during his career. The sentiments continued to build because dreams were becoming a part of everyday life all around me. It was no longer a stretch of the imagination to say “my president is Black!” or that perhaps America was moving toward a new era that we’ve all been waiting for…change, the same word that an amazing campaign was built on, change and hope. I returned to Madrid a few days later to work on the moment God had given me. In truth, the honeymoon phase had passed and now I was in a city, with a language that I was not fluent in, and city folks that truly weren’t that friendly. As someone who refuses to stay in any bubbles set for myself, I could feel myself becoming upset that the interaction I expected with native-Spanish speakers and Madrid’s citizens was not coming to pass. Instead, I was there with my American friends in and out of class, speaking our common language of English, having a great party life, and feeling my Spanish reach a plateau where it wasn’t getting better or worse…it just “was”.
With this feeling of just existing and not progressing, I waited, I meditated, and I prayed for guidance. Then after something like a fairytale, I booked a weekend trip with my friend Tammy to Sevilla to get away in hopes of clearing my mind from my surroundings and focusing harder on what I was supposed to receive from my study abroad experience. After meeting so many international students from all over Europe and South America, and even some from the U.S., all studying in Sevilla at actual Spanish universities with native Spanish students, I knew immediately that HEY THAT’S WHAT I CAME HERE FOR!!!!
So I did the unthinkable and left my program in Madrid to move to Sevilla and enroll in a local university called the Universidad de Pablo Olavide, by far the most adventurous thing I’ve done in my life. Moving to a place, I’ve only seen once and completely risking my academic semester, but I had one of those “feelings” that it was right even though it logically could not be explained. But four months later, I can tell you that my Spanish literally has me feeling that I am reaching the top of the ladder to fluency, if not being two steps from already achieving it, I made a life friend (love ya Tammy), and I got the opportunity to experience Spain and its inhabitants on a completely different level. Between my trips to Granada, Barcelona/Catalunya, Ibiza, Palma Mallorca, Valencia, and Cordoba all within Spain and then to Greece and the Greek islands, it is clear that God had a plan and something to show me. That extent of traveling would not have been possible on my NYU in Madrid schedule and the Spanish I had to use to communicate and most importantly hear the stories and histories of the locals would have never been at the proper level. But still Madrid was a blessing, Sevilla was a blessing, and every person I met contributed to my life in a unique way. I thank God for making all of this possible including the family and friends that supported me through this. To my Mom, Grandmother, and Auntie that were always there to hear me vent on a phone call, I can’t tell you how much it meant to have people to talk to when you’re so far away from home. To my Aunt Candace and Uncle Bruce that literally financed this trip and gave me the spiritual talk that I needed before I left their house in Michigan/gave me great advice while I was abroad, my travels and attitude toward this trip would have never been the same without you. To my sister who managed to keep me laughing through this whole process between her emails, comments on my blog and our phone conversations, I LOVE YOU! And love to my brother Bryson and Asha for coming all the way across the Atlantic to see your little sister! It was great to see you guys and some familiar faces in Spain. And to my Dad who gave me some great words of advice for returning to New York and my last days in Spain, it was exactly what I needed to hear to prepare me for my last year of school.
Although I thought I’d be moving to live in Cordoba for the next 2 months to intern for the Plataforma Andaluza de Apoyo al Lobby Europeo de Mujeres (Andalucian Platform of Support to the European Lobby of Women), I ended up moving back home to Jersey and currently thinking about my next steps. My senior year of college starts in less than 3 months and I’m sure that God has a ton more things to show me before that accomplishment. I wanted to put together some picture memories for you all from all my trips, experiences, and last days of being in Sevilla. Thanks for all the continued support while I was abroad. I love you all!!!!!
Arielle
I’ve always been the baby of my friends thanks to my Dad putting me in pre-school early. But even in college, I just always seem to drift toward the older crowd, not by much (the typical age gap between my friends and I is between 2-5 years) but just enough for me to sit back and observe the “life and trials” of a recent American college graduate. Just about all of my friends graduated a few weeks ago and the story has been the same: no job (or one without benefits), moving home (because they can’t afford to live on their own), and literally just confused about what steps to take next in life. Grad school rejection letters have been flying left and right because “hey” that was everyone’s chosen direction once the economy crashed, “I’ll just stay in school until it’s over.” And now everyone is kind of just sulking on their living room couches dealing with the after effect of being a college graduate with loans about to kick in, in approximately 6 months.
I was talking to one of my friend’s in London about the whole American student thing of needing to find a job within 6 months to pay off student loans and he looked at me like I was crazy. Supposedly in the U.K., student loans are attached to your social security number, when you get a job, the bank takes out a certain percentage of your salary to go toward your student loans, but if you end up unemployed then you aren’t obligated to start paying back the debt until you get a job. Wow, isn’t that a novelty? That would sure help out a lot of students in America right now and take off the stress of finding a decent job as soon as possible. But since America is really just one large bank, I mean our Federal Reserve actually is privately owned, I doubt something like that would come to pass. I’m thankful that my president is throwing out billions in aid to American families, but really the whole system needs restructuring. Why put the monster on a diet when you can just kill it?
In the “meantime” (as I always like to quote Iyanla Vanzant), my friends have all found themselves at the crossroads. Spending time on your parents couch and watching reruns of Maury, will always make you think. The truth of the matter is (at least I believe) that God always shows you what direction to take. He probably showed you months ago and perhaps you weren’t listening, or maybe you need to be at home right now for reasons yet to show themselves. Don’t fret, it’s all going to work out, and I’m not just saying that because I’m in Spain. America always bounces back. The question just becomes, how much longer until another recession and how will we all prepare to not be in this situation again?
I’ll meet you at the Crossroads.
After 469 pages, I had this somewhat epiphany that went something like “Arielle, remember when you used to blog about the random thoughts that popped into your head before you moved to Spain?” Admittedly, not having 24 hour internet access and having to pay a drink price at café just to use their wifi, has kind of disconnected me from the online world. Yes, it’s true. I manage to check my email still just about everyday and mostly the same for my Facebook. I try to blog after I travel. But up to date devices such as Twitter (and yes, ladies and gentlemen thanks to Undercurrent, the social media think-tank, aka my former employer that introduced me to the blogosphere/social media world from a business perspective, I had Twitter way before CNN or any other major media brand made it extremely popular follow me at ariellep for updates when I return back to NYC) unfortunately, I don’t have the opportunity to use it that much here in Spain, nor do I have the desire to. I really enjoyed being in New York, walking down the street and seeing something funny and putting a comment through a text message to have it update my Twitter feed. But that luxury is no longer there thanks to Verizon not being able to service an affordable international plan through my LG touch screen phone (you would think something decently technologically advanced would have such capabilities), but these days I guess the only way people get things done is through a Blackberry, right?
Well to that I say, damn the masses and after reading Candace Bushnell’s One Fifth Avenue after one of my nostalgic moments where I started to think, “hey, maybe I do miss New York,” and rushed to Casa del Libro where I remembered seeing the book on sale in English, I realized that I simply don’t. I do not miss New York. Although once and always considered a suburban Jersey girl, after a year at New York University, New York has become home. It is my home. It’s a part of me and gives me the same feeling that every student feels when they return home to see their parents in their hometown, extremely excited at first to have a great home cooked meal and family attention, only a week later to find out, OMG I am ready to move back into my little dorm and reclaim my freedom. I think my return to New York will be somewhat like that. I’ll be so excited to be back in the hustle and bustle, and then after about a week and the reality of senior year facing me, I’ll be ready to fly back over to Europe, back to my little room I am renting in this old house in Sevilla, Spain.
I guess the pursuit of happiness never really ends, and it is somewhat bothersome that it’s penned so clearly in American capitalism and symbolism. Although I am not a continuous Bushnell reader, what she did do with quite grace was point out the ridiculousness of New York society, money, wealth, and how everyone moving to New York has this goal to “make it” in the big city. I was there almost 2 years ago, a 17 year old senior high school graduate, who just had to move to New York and attend New York University to make her dreams of becoming a writer and magazine editor come true. And I started blazing that path and accomplished a lot, but right when you think you have it all planned out, a fast ball hits you in the chest. After losing my wind and coughing up what seemed to be a refreshing revelation, I realized that I probably will not be living in New York after next year. I also realize that I could be taking that back with the proper job opportunity presenting itself, because New York has this thing where it sucks in any type of humble or peaceful mentality you arrive with and spits back out this hungry monster that wants to ball all types of potential success into the quickest route possible. Bushnell points that out so vividly, and I encourage all aspiring New York socialites or future professionals to read her book and realize what you are getting into. Admittedly, I didn’t see the light until I moved to Spain because even in London, I was obsessed with getting back to New York and spent the majority of my winter break there instead of in Jersey. Not saying that will change when I return, because I really do like having my space as a young woman, but now New York has just become a temporary skyline. It will always be there but never a permanent fixture in my brain. I like being in Sevilla and being able to repeat the same pair of jeans 3 times in a week or having to hang my laundry on clothing lines because we don’t use dryers. Also, I love washing dishes without a dishwasher, and that I could literally sit in my cozy bedroom and read six novels consecutively in a week, manage my homework, travel, and learn from so many people just because you have made a point to learn and speak their language. New York doesn’t have that; it is the most relevant microcosm of America and our consumer heel in the ground style. I’m out of the bubble now and it will never be reconstructed. STICK ME IN A HOUSE IN BRASIL SOMEWHERE AND LET ME WRITE MY NOVELS! (after I manage to learn Portuguese lol)
Link to Candace Bushnell’s website
Much love,
Ari
So I couldn’t have been more excited about my brother Bryson and Asha coming to visit me in Spain. They had been planning this trip for months and I was soooo happy to see it come through. Other than my Aunt Candace popping through to London (and me meeting her there), I haven’t seen my family since late January, so it felt great to see some familiar faces in my temporary home of Europe.
Although I reeeallllyyyy wished Brys and Ash would’ve came to Andalucia (the BEST region of Spain PERIOD!), it’s definitely understandable that Spain is a big country even though it seems little. It cannot be done in a week comfortably. Therefore, I flew up north to meet them in Valencia after they experienced Barcelona and Palma Mallorca. If I had to pick my favorite place next to Sevilla, hands down it would be Valencia. The paella and the city is a mix between a Madrid/Barcelona and Andalucia. The people are fairly nice and its a decent paced environment for a working professional. Nevertheless, as tourists, we ate great paella, went to a biopark (aka a zoo) under Asha’s insistance lol, hit up the LLADRO factory (I now understand why those little porcelein glass figures are so expensive), and then they went to the aquarium while I went to hunt down this store named Mala Mujer that had this t-shirt I saw on this girl in Sevilla and wanted lol (no seriously, I really haven’t been shopping here like that to save money for plane tickets lol).
I then flew to Madrid (they took the train), and we went to a beautiful flamenco show (which was surprising because the best flamenco shows are typically in Andalucia, where flamenco was founded). But it was no surprise that all the dancers were from where….you guessed it…ANDALUCIA. Can you guys tell that I’ve become an Andalucia girl at heart? hahaha Anyway, the following day I spent almost 12 hours writing my final 6 page paper on psychology theory in Spanish. After endless hours of torturous readings in Spanish, citing, and writing, I officially can declare I’M A SENIOR BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, family get ready for Ari’s graduation next May 
But we celebrated that night by checking out Madrid’s night life and then I left the following afternoon to head back to Sevilla. In all, I think Bryson and Asha’s first experience in Spain and Europe was a positive one and I hope they get to come back (thanks to the mess ups of Air France)!
Without a doubt, Sevilla is the place for artistry. Whether you are a writer, painter, sculptor, photographer, artisan, dancer or whatever, the inspiration is here for your craft and with nothing but pure natural happiness alive in the atmosphere; so many great things have been created. For one, the Feria festival had all types of medieval artists selling their crafts for almost 3 days straight (I actually got a lot of friends and family gifts from there!). But moreover, at night there and all throughout the day, there were performances by dancers, flamenco and contemporary singers, amongst other talents. It was definitely a lot of fun and a great way to enjoy Sevilla before my final exams (which went really well!). Below are some pictures of an oriental dance group that did belly dancing/hindu routines.
However, the most remarkable artistry by all that I have seen in Sevilla was definitely the Desvuelos exposition by photographer Angéle Etoundi Essamba. She photographed the most beautiful images of African women in veils and head pieces that I have ever seen. The exposition is right in the middle of the tourist area, walking from Plaza Espana to the Giralda, and simply captivates who ever’s eye that glances by it. As a writer, I love seeing people who follow their art even when it’s the less popular societal or monetary choice. Although in truth, one day we all have to support ourselves, it’s so important to stay true to the talents God has given you, because you never know how he may use you to express them!
Here are a few snapshots of Essamba’s exposition, enjoy!
